Children want what they want because they want it. At first they are like pint sized robbers. They will bite, scratch and clobber each other over the head to get what they want. But even children can be taught a different way. All they have to do is observe another child or adult getting what they want and before long, you see one say to the other, “I’ll let you play with my car if you’ll let me play with your truck.”
While as adults we don’t generally bite, scratch or clobber like little robbers anymore, we do want what someone else has without paying for it. In essence, we’ve become savvy thieves. Thieves know that what you have is valuable. They also know that they have no intention of paying for it. So, they seek out people who are unsuspecting of the fact that they want what they have but aren’t willing to pay for it.
You know what I find equally ironic? Many of the people who do it are folks who themselves are trying to turn their dream into a reality. They are surfing the web trying to find out how to get more clients, more readers, more success.
My friends, this mentality is the silent killer of success. I call it the consumer mentality. You know why? They consume. Another word for consume is devour. They devour. And when something is devoured, there is nothing left. Whether they are doing it to you or you are doing it to them, it’s a mentality that will lay waste to all that you’ve worked for. Most of all, it’s a waste of your time.
We live in a bargain-hunting world. And while major retailers or the fellow on the street with the watches might let you negotiate on price, bargain-hunters don’t attract abundance. I don’t know about you, but I want abundance. An abundance of clients. An abundance of influence. An abundance of money. Your time is money. So, if you have a dream of something more, here is a piece of advice. You ready? Giving opens up windows and pours out blessings. Never take without giving and never allow anyone to take from you without giving first.
Know this, when someone comes asking and they say, “I can’t pay you,” they don’t know what they have of value. They might not have money, but everyone has currency: something to offer that someone else would find valuable. May I write you a review? Can I help with your next event? Do you need someone to man your table at the event? Can I comment on a blog or Facebook group page? Can I write you a press release? These are all suggested ways of contributing that would garner an overwhelming YES response.
So next time someone comes to you telling you that they need to get together with you or need to talk to you, do this. Let them know how excited you are for them, ask them how you can be of service. (They’ll tell you. Trust me, they will tell you.) From there, you can share with them ways you can help. You can invite them to purchase products or services that you feel would be a great fit. Make sure to have something with various price points. If they say, “No, I really need to talk with you,” then let them know what your consultation fee is. If they can’t pay it or aren’t enthusiastic about contributing to you in other meaningful ways, then you can graciously tell them “no.” Now, they might get angry. Be prepared for that. And when guilt tries to harangue you for not helping someone in “need,” remind yourself that you made an adult decision and avoided having your time wasted.
The most important takeaway is this. Everyone has the ability to contribute whether they have lots of money or don’t. Don’t let anyone waste your time.
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